how to find inner guidance

When I was about 15, I got my first taste of spirituality in the form of psychic, magic, tarot and spirit guides. I still have a couple of tarot decks to prove it!

[Rider Waite > can’t go wrong with traditional, Doreen Virtue’s Angel Tarot Cards > perfect for beginners and Thoth Tarot Deck > better for the advanced, these have quite a dark energy.]

I loved that shit. I even learned how to do tarot readings. I think I read for two people and I got a lot of stuff ‘right’ but it was a lot of work and to be honest it kinda scared the shit outta me.

I was on the search for guidance and wisdom. I wanted to find my place in the world and I wanted to be a part of something more meaningful than maths homework and who hooked up with who at a random party I wasn’t invited to over the weekend.

In my studies, I was taught a lot about spirit guides and how you have maaaaany different ones + extras come and go over time. Like around that time till I was about 18 I had a beautiful woman who had the most mesmerizing green eyes and the longest, shinest brunette hair I’d ever seen. She was always around when I went through challenges (and let me tell you… there were A LOT of challenges).

Well, she’s gone now, and now there’s this dude called… well I can let you know how our little convo went the other day. This is how my inner guidance likes to work…

Picture this: I’m sitting on a concrete park bench in what seems like wine country overlooking a large paddock with about 5 auburn coloured horses. It’s sunset and I can hear the birds singing goodnight to other birdy friends in trees nearby. There’s distant voices of children playing outside before their parents call them in for dinner, a low rumble of the 5 o’clock traffic on their way home and the air has a calm almost zen-like sound whizzing through the air.

I just had an argument with my man, I feel like shit and I have every right to because it was my fault. I look out over the paddock and quietly ask myself in the back of my mind… “What do I do?”

Finding Inner Guidance

Suddenly this voice comes out of nowhere, “You talk to me.”

“What do I call you?”



“Trust me, you’re gonna remember me.”


“How do you feel?”

“Awful. I just sabotaged that whole experience.”

“Oh right, so you’re only human after all.”

“But I should have known better, I do this every single time.”

“And what do you do every single time you do this?”

“…Run away……”

“Okay, so maybe it’s time to try a new angle?”


“Well, getting out to clear your head and breathe some fresh air is always good for the soul. You get so cooped up on that computer of yours you forget to come here and smell the scent on the air and listen to the stillness. Running away from your problems is the quick fix to a deeper problem. It takes courage and perseverance to go back into the fire and communicate. But you know that that’s the only way for you because you have built so much trust and respect into this relationship you would be letting yourself down. You know you can do this, you know you will.”

“Yeah, you’re right.”


how to find your spirit guide

This is how my inner guidance works and I love it this way. Because the truth is, I believe that the wisdom and messages I receive are from deep within myself. Everything there is to know, I know already. It just so happens that my way of delivering those messages to myself are in the form of putting a name and face to the message. I like the idea of ‘something else’ out there that’s got my back. Whatever it is be it the universe, higher self, inner guidance or spirit guides. It’s all the same.

So whether you’re thinking “Holy shit, this girl is a nutbar.” or “That is so cool! I wanna learn how to do that!” here are a couple of ways you can start connecting with your inner guidance.

+ Find a Peaceful Place

When I used to actively seek guidance, I would always head to one of my favourite parks in all of Auckland and find a lovely park bench situated among a beautiful rose garden. Listening to the birds and the water fountain was so peaceful and I felt I could easily connect with myself there. Do you have a peaceful place? If so where is it? Search for a peaceful place that suits you.

+ Calm Your Mind & Listen

Guidance can’t come to you if your stressing about something or your too busy facebooking. Take time to rest your thoughts and just listen to the silence. Try not to think about anything, just get lost in the moment of silence and see what happens.

+ Ask a Question

While you’re listening to the silence, send out a wee question to test the waters. Sometimes the answer is immediate, sometimes it takes a while and sometimes it doesn’t come until a few days later. I always tend to get immediate answers, as if I’m talking to a friend. But if I desperately want a response, I have to wait until I am calm and connected.

+ Look for Signs

This is another fun thing I like to do when I’m driving. I’ll be like “Yo Universe! Can you give me a sign about this.” And I won’t actively look but something will stand out to me more than usual. I might have seen it a million times but this time in particular there’s something on it I need to see and I get my answer.

When I was first starting out, it took a little practice but very quickly it becomes second nature and you can do it whenever you want. Just another muscle to work out 😛

Elise xo

  • I completely get what you mean about wanting something more than schoolwork and gossip about who's hooking up with who! I get so fed up when I hear girls in my university classes gossiping before and after class in a petty way and being judgemental. I'm over it!
    Seriously, though, this is awesome advice. It really goes with the thinking that we have all the guidance and help we need inside of us! I don't know if I agree with the fact that EVERY SINGLE bit of guidance we need is inside of us – an outside perspective is rarely unhelpful – but I do think there are some truths we just…know, y'know?
    Also, I find that going outside helps loads for this kind of deep thinking. Even I move from my bedroom to the living room, which is usually a quiet place, it just isn't the same as getting out into the fresh air where there isn't the energy of family members and people you know all around you.
    Thanks for this! 🙂
    – Laura

  • No probs Laura 😉

    It definitely is a process and you've just gotta take it one step at a time.x